I recently finished reading the book Anger: Handling a Powerful Emotion in a Healthy Way (link) by Gary Chapman, author of the Five Love Languages (link). This book was a required reading for me, and one I wasn’t too excited about it. However, as I began reading it, it was just a breeze to read. Having small kids around all the time, reading deep books can be laborious at times. That was not the case with this book. I found it to be both Biblical and practical.
Everyone experiences anger. Anger in itself is not wrong; it is not a sin. What we do with our anger and how we process it is the key to healthy hearts and healthy relationships. If processed wrongly, it can be sinful. Gary Chapman offers great incite from the Bible on determining the type of anger and practical steps to handle it in a Godly, mature way.
My mom always told me that men typically divide their emotions into two categories: Happy and Angry. Essentially, it is positive emotions and negative emotions. I found that the applications taught in this book were applicable to processing any negative emotion – whether hurt feelings, frustration, disappointment, upset feelings, and, of course, anger.
Gary Chapman also offers advise on forgiveness, handling anger with your spouse, helping your children process and express anger in a healthy way, and how to handle an angry person.
I personally was really challenged in the area of forgiveness and holding onto to anger. Not forgiving is a sin. Holding on to hurt feelings is a sin. Hurt feelings over time becomes bitterness. Bitterness can transform into hate in the heart. We need to seek restoration, healing, and forgiveness because this is what God has done for us. He has called us, as believers, to be “ministers of reconciliation” and “ministers of the Gospel of the Grace of God.”